Halfway Through My First Round of Project 333

I am just a few weeks away from the half way point of my 333 Project. If you remember I was feeling a little anxious about whether or not I could actually pull my clothes loving self out of the routine of having so many clothes and working with limited options.

I think the most surprising thing about this experiment is the fact that I have magically cleared about fifteen minutes in my morning schedule. No really. I didn't believe it myself but I realized that the minutes were ticking away as I stared into the depths of my closet trying to figure out what to wear. I love that my mornings are more relaxed and I realize that limiting my choices has helped my quality of life.

I am also slowly honing my personal style. I thought I'd share a few of my favorite wardrobe items to celebrate the halfway mark of the project.

Everlane:

I love Everlane's transparent pricing and high quality product. I own two of their V Cotton T (pictured above left) and their Cotton Lawn shirt (pictured above right) is one of the go to shirts in my closet.  I also loved their campaign over the last couple of years to encourage thoughtful consumerism. They shut down their website on Black Friday for the last two years. This year they left it open but dedicated all sales to the building of a rec center for their employees working at factories overseas. I am thrilled with the quality of the product, the effortlessness of the look, and the ideology behind the brand. It's a win, win, win! 

Portofino Shirt from Express

I have three versions of this shirt in my closet. I particularly like the long sleeve shirt because you can roll it to make it three quarter length. It is dressy enough for work but can easily be more casual when pared with jeans.

Well that's it for now! I can't wait to see what I think after I wrap my first three month session and do the planning for the next one. :)

Do We Have Giving All Wrong?

I grew up in the family that flew their holiday flag loudly and proudly. Or rather, my mom raised it and my father either acquiesced grumpily or threw himself whole heartedly into the parts of the experience he liked (like making bacon on Christmas morning and reading the Christmas story prior to presents) and then got grumpy again.

We had some pretty incredible times and all seven of us have fantastic stories of the holidays. Ironically, none of those stories revolve around the gifts we were given. Instead we laugh about how we'd receive those gifts from Santa, The Tooth Fairy, The Domestic Fairy, or The Lingerie Fairy. I love thinking about us taking turns in the gift wrapping room and trying to come up with the funniest fairy or unicorn or wretched dwarf to send gifts from. While I love Christmas, I think I loved the act of preparing for it more than anything else.

I know that the holidays can be a stressful time for parents and often was stressful for mine as they tried to get all seven of their children the presents they wanted for Christmas. I wonder if all the stress and sacrifice is worth it? Especially as an adult I can barely remember the gifts I received.

My favorite gift from my childhood was a violin my grandmother sent me. I took lessons for a few years and then fell off the wagon but there was something about opening that gift that has stuck with me when all the others no matter how nice have drifted off down memory lane never to be heard of again. I find it interesting that the gift I most remember was really the experience more than a gift.

So when I stumbled across this article, it made me wonder if we have the holidays all wrong. Are we teaching our children that presents are more important than anything else? Not that I have any children to teach but I do have a whole load of nieces, nephews, brothers, and sisters.

For the last couple of years Dom and I had tried unsuccessfully to get our siblings and my parents to fill out the paperwork so we could send savings bonds to the kids. Apparently, you need parental permission to do so. The process was cumbersome and bulky and it just never really worked out. This article inspired me to do something different when filling out my nieces birthday card. I sent a note to her parents as well. It read like this:

Dear Ian and Priscella,

I hope all is well in beautiful Colorado and your family is happy and well. Dom and I have decided that we really wanted to stop giving presents or physical stuff as gifts to our nieces and nephews. We’ve both come to learn that the greatest treasures in our lives are experiences. 

We hope that by sending this money to you, you can help direct it to the right channels. Perhaps this can help send Jael to summer camp, swimming lessons, or something she is interested in during the year. Maybe it should go into her college fund or the family vacation fund. We think that you know her best and can make sure that she has a wonderful experience with this birthday gift.

We can’t wait to hear about the ways it’s being used and all the things that Jael is discovering as her world expands.

We love you guys and wish we were closer! Hope to see you on our return stateside!

Hugs,

Crystal & Dom

I will have to keep you posted on how it is received as things take awhile to get from here back stateside. I wonder if anyone out there has tried to give the gift of experience versus stuff? What did you find?

A Clotheshorse Tries to Minimize

I've always been obsessed with clothes and shoes. My mother called me Amelda Marcus from an early age due to the ridiculous amount of footwear in my closet. I've come to realize that clothing is my status symbol. Some people want a fancy car or a house with a three car garage, but my daydreams are all Sex And The City and Jimmy Choo shoes. In all fairness, my practical side is heavy handed with the fashion diva in my head so it's not like I am spending absurd amounts of money on these things.

When I started minimizing, I also started analyzing what is truly important in life. And I am slowly coming around to the realization that my infatuation with clothing has something to do with my vision of myself. Clothing is a means for me to feel like I can be whoever I am dressing to be.

Work Powerhouse: Blazer, button up, scarf, and perfect manicure. 

Hostess with the Mostest: Sundress, heels, cute apron while serving up something delicious.

Photographer: Black on black on black. 

A power outfit sometimes gives me confidence that I might not of had on my own. Am I simply playing dress up like I did when I was a girl? Is this obsession just another tier of my unhealthy struggle with perfectionism? What happens if I remove this element from my life? Does something more important come into focus?

As I was asking myself important questions about how I measured my own worth, Dom had me read this book.  Among other things, I learned about the 333 Project. In this minimalism exercise, you choose 33 items to wear over 3 months. You box everything else up in your closet. Repeat this on a seasonal basis.

The idea kept niggling at me and wouldn't leave me alone. It was particularly powerful one night as I reflected on my photo shoots from the previous week where I documented the lives of Rwandan mothers and realized how grateful I should be for all I have. In that moment, I felt that I wanted to focus more intently on the truly important things in my life instead of being caught up in my own frivolity. It was time to put my money where my mouth was.

As I pulled things from my closet, I was surprised how much resistance I felt. I was nervous. Dare I say afraid? I found myself in front of my closet having a series of mental arguments with myself with an angel on one shoulder and the devil wears Prada on the other.

Clothes do not the woman make. 

But everyone is used to seeing you dressed nicely. What will people think?

It's not like you won't be dressed nicely. You'll wear nice things, just less of them.

You'll look stupid. 

No one will even notice----why do you think they would?

You can do anything for three months.

Why are you even putting yourself through this?

What's the big deal? Are you so shallow that you cannot do without a few articles of clothing?

Push, pull, push, pull.

I eventually  overcame all the voices in my head, but I still feel a bit uneasy about the project. Enter this blog post for the sheer sake of accountability.

Project 333
I narrowed my closet to 33 items of clothing and footwear. This did not include additional accessories. I minimized my accessories to 10 earrings, 1 ring, 2 bracelets, and 9 necklaces (all the true minimalists out there will find this atrocious but consider this my baby steps in the right direction). This also does not include my workout clothes, underthings, or a small selection of 12 items that I wear only on photo shoots out to the field as my shoot clothing gets pretty beat up in the long term.

I am not sure what I expect to come out of this exercise. I figure I will either be surprised by what you can do with very little and be sold on the idea in the long term or completely hate the entire process. I hope that this continues my journey of really focusing on the things that matter in life regardless of how it turns out. Our lives are so short, and we have so much more than most people in the world. I hope we all take the time to enjoy it.

Trying Out Minimalism for Ourselves

As many of you read in my last post Dom and I are exploring the idea of minimizing the things in our lives that take up space.  We realized that it's not only stuff that takes up our time. It's also things like cable and the internet. Every evening things seemed to be panning out the same way. Dinner, work out, veg out on bad AFN television or mindless internet surfing.

So we decided to put this minimalism thing to the test.

Trying Out Minimalism Our Way

1. Get rid of the stuff we simply aren't using. We spent last weekend going through every room in the house (still haven't made it to the storage room). I also am trying the Oprah hanger trick  for the next thirty days to see what I am using on a regular basis. In 30 days we have to revisit the items we decided to keep---have we used them? Are they adding to our life?

2. We are limited the amount of time we spend on the internet and on television each day. No more than one hour of internet after 6:00 p.m. per day. No more than an hour of television each day.

3. For every new item we purchase, we have to get rid of two old things.

4. We started a list of all the things we want to do and are proactively moving forward.


I've learned a few things at the end of our first week. Minimizing actually feels good especially when you realize that many of the items you are keeping are for sentimental reasons. I kept asking myself if the person who gave me the item ever thought of it again? And yet here I was keeping it because of my love for the person who gave it to me not because I truly loved it or used it. I think I need to transfer that love into creating a more meaningful relationships with that person or people. Keeping their gifts around me doesn't do a thing for our relationship. If I am thinking about them then I should call them, visit them, send them a card. I should build on the relationship.

It also feels good to give things to people who need them and will use them. We are spoiled by the massive shipment of stuff we are allowed to bring abroad. But many of our friends are making do with what they were able to bring from home in a suitcase. I have a guest room set up for "shopping" and I'll donate the rest to one of the many places doing good in Rwanda.

It's lots of fun to do things instead of watching tv. This weekend we went to a jazz event, jewelry and craft show, had friends over for dessert and drinks, and ran off to Lake Muhazi with some friends for lunch and boating on Sunday. I didn't miss CSI at all!

I have a feeling this whole experience is headed somewhere but we're still figuring it out where it's going. All I know is that I feel good about it. This week we've gotten several shipments of things we ordered prior to the whole minimalist epiphany. We both laughed because none of them seemed important or worth the money we spent. Time to figure out if I can return it all and to decide what to do next weekend!

Do We Need This Stuff?

I just realized that I might be addicted to stuff. You’d never know because my home storage space is strategically set up to look tidy. Not to mention the ample space in my four bedrooms/4.5 bath deluxe FS digs.  It’s not like I need to be on hoarders, but I do have a meaningful relationship with the buy it now button on Amazon.

I spent several hours doing some minimalist reading and I realized that I have a lot of stuff. I feel like living in a beautiful space with beautiful things somehow makes me more worthy. Worthy of what? I have no idea.

I assume this has something to do with my childhood and the fact that I didn’t grow up having a lot. I am sure there is some type psychoanalysis that would show I am compensating because I equate stuff with happiness. The whole idea is pretty ridiculous.

In the Foreign Service, Dom and I are allotted 250 lbs each of UAB (Unaccompanied Air Baggage). That’s the stuff that shows up within the first couple weeks at post and tides us over until our HHE arrives. We are allowed to bring up a whopping 7,200 lbs in our HHE (Household Effects). This doesn’t include the 2,500 lbs of consumables we were allotted at this post or the fact that most of our furniture is provided by the Embassy.  We’ve never moved our entire weight allotment. But I have to questions if I really need to be moving over 10,000 lbs of stuff all over the world on a regular basis?

I had this epiphany once before on January 12, 2010. The night of the earthquake in Haiti, Dom and I were allowed to go back to our homes for fifteen minutes to gather whatever belongings we might need. We were told that it was likely that our homes would be looted in the night. I remember standing in the entryway trying to figure out what was important enough to take, the one thing in that house that was irreplaceable to me was Dom. We left with laptops, camera gear, paperwork, pillows, and a duffle with a change of clothes and a few toiletries. Nothing else really mattered.

Four years later I am reminded that the stuff that I have chosen to fill my life up doesn’t bring happiness. I’m not saying that I am not happy. But my greatest happiness comes from relationships, photography, and adventure. The real question is what could I be doing with all the time and money that I’ve been investing in stuff? What about you? What could you be doing if you traded in your stuff for experiences?

Adventures in Cape Town

It's been almost a year since Dom and I arrived in Kigali, Rwanda. We decided it was well past time for a break. So, we put our vacation fund to use and ran away to Cape Town.

Check out our video reel for fun highlights and don't miss our Top 10 list from Cape Town and the Cape Winelands.


Adventures in Cape Town from Crystaline Randazzo on Vimeo.

Table Mountain
Before arriving, someone told me that Cape Town is like Colorado meeting the California coast. I felt so at home in the slightly arid climate. Our ride to the top of Table Mountain was one of the most breathtaking things we experienced. We spent the following two hours wandering around the edge and communing with nature.

The Potluck Club 
It should come as no surprise that much of our trip revolved around food. When we discovered that we couldn't get a reservation at The Test Kitchen, South Africa's best restaurant, we decided to try out their sister restaurant. It's located at the top of the Old Biscuit Mill with amazing views of Table Mountain and Table Bay. I'm still dreaming about their pork belly, Korean fried chicken, and popcorn ice cream.

Sailing Around the VA Waterfront
A client of mine who is South African recommended that we take a sunset sailboat tour around table mountain. I admit I had my doubts when I saw the throngs of tourists and boat options at the Waterfront. But I am so glad that we did it! Even the sailboat captain was taking photos; he said that the winter solstice always brings the best sunsets. What better way to celebrate the beginning of our vacation then a champagne toast?!

The Cape Point Drive
We originally blocked off two days for the drive but found it was totally do-able in one. Each beach seemed more beautiful than the last and we promised ourselves that we would have to come back and enjoy them in the summer. It was pretty cool to be at the most south western tip of Africa and to hang out with a few penguins. Maybe next time we'll get to go in whale watching season!

Spice Route Wine Farm/ Vrende en Lust
There are so many wineries that it's quite difficult to choose! Spice Route was an amazing estate with wine tasting, fine art glass blowing, chocolate factory, coffee shop, brewery, and restaurant. It was our first stop on the tour and the wine/chocolate pairing knocked our socks off! Vrende en Lust came highly recommended by multiple parties and now we know why. We loved every bottle we tasted. Fun fact: I was able to bring home 10 bottles of wine, 3 pieces of ceramics, and 2 pieces of glass art. I have mad packing skills.

Franschhoek
We stayed two nights in Franschoek and two nights in Stellenbosch. When we go back, I think we will stay put in Franshhoek. It was such a charming town! Downtown was full of art galleries, restaurants, and boutiques. Surprisingly, the Cape winelands is really easy to drive. And there's a trolley if you don't want to bother with a DD.

La Petite Dauphine
This bed and breakfast was absolutely fabulous! All the portraits you saw in the video were shot there. Little cabins are nestled in between fields of grapes and olives. Breakfast and dinner were absolutely delicious! My favorite part were the four pups that ran around and the rooster, Heinrich, who kept an eye on us during meals from his perch on top of the piano.

Indochine Restaurant
We stumbled up this place at lunch and couldn't get a seating. So we came back for dinner and we are so glad that we did. We did the tasting menu and every course was divine! Make sure to book in advance!

Photo Session with Christine Meintjes
As Dom and I are celebrating five years of marriage this year, I was determined to get some professional photos done on our trip. After many hours of research I came across Christine's website and I just had to have her. We had such a great time hanging out with her and it was fun to just relax and be ourselves. I am so glad we have photos to help us remember this time in our life and our vacation to Cape Town.

If anyone is planning a trip to Cape Town, I am happy to share a more extensive list of sites!

The Law of Divine Compensation

I recently finished reading a book that changed my perspective on how I look at my work, my preconceived notions about money, and my fear of success. I realized that in many ways that I blamed the FS lifestlye for what I saw as a lack of success. I also realized that I am so terrified of failing that I'd rather hide behind that excuse then risk failure. And so with trembly knees I decided to change my attitude.

I don't really like rules but I gave myself one. Be grateful.  I was determined to take the time to be grateful for my life, my work, and the people around me.

I hadn't had any photography work coming in and multiple contracts that never came through for one reason or another. In the mean time, I began researching small nonprofits in Rwanda that fell into my portfolios of interest. These were women's issues, agriculture, and education. The organizations had primarily voluntary staffs and no operating budgets for marketing so I knew I wasn't taking away work from other photographers. If the work wasn't going to come to me then I was going to go to it.

"We experience who we really are, and what it is we're meant to do, in any moment when we pour our love into the universe."- The Law of Divine Compensation

After a quick trip to the U.S. I came back to Kigali ready to work on my new projects. And then the most amazing thing happened. Paid work just started showing up at my door. I made a conscious effort to follow my rule and multiple times during my shoots I reminded myself to cherish the moments. Then I'd get back home and have another quote inquiry in my inbox.

Who knows what the reasons are? Maybe it's because there is a lot of attention on Rwanda and the twentieth anniversary of the genocide. Maybe I've been here long enough that more people know me and pass my name around. Maybe I changed my attitude and the universe responded.

There have been many times that I have felt the lowest depths of failure as I try to navigate the foreign service and following my passion. But the highs that come along with them are not relished nearly as much as they should be. I live in Rwanda and I am getting to tell amazing stories through photography of another culture and connect with interesting people every day. I am grateful!

"You are internally programmed to rise to your highest creative possibility. Nothing you do can erase the yearning of your soul to achieve it, or the yearning of the universe to give it to you". 
-The Law of Divine Compensation